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I’m a Barbie Girl

March 15th, 2009


First, before I begin, I want to wish my BFF Barbie a Happy 50th Birthday! I am SO excited to see all of the hype surrounding my girl Barbie turning the “Big 5-0″. Barbie and I are COOL. We go wayyyyyyy back, I mean way back to the Barbie hot pink Corvette way back, I mean way back to Barbie and The Rockers (”rockin’ out we’re totally in the groove…in the groove!”) with the cassette tape and all way back…and when I say I had all the Barbies, I mean I had ALL the Barbies. I had Doctor Barbie, Astronaut Barbie, Malibu Barbie, Eskimo Barbie, Spain Barbie, Barbie and all of The Rockers (”…Dana, DeeDee, Derek, and Diva tooooooo”), the Barbie cosmetic head, various Bride Barbies, Barbie’s pregnant friend, some Skippers, and even her cousins The Heart Family and all of their kids. My Barbies had a fully furnished Dream House, Corvettes, Farraris, motor homes, buses, horses, motorcycles, a Rock Star stage, and the best part, a fully accessorized and seasonal appropriate designer wardrobe, of course. My Barbies even had fully choreographed runway shows! See, I was very serious about Barbie. I played with my Barbies faithfully until I was about 14 years old and I still play Barbies with little girls every opportunity that I get. Needless to say, I cannot WAIT until Anna is old enough to play Barbies. I am ready!

Speaking of not being able to wait to share Barbie with my daughter, I couldn’t believe it when I read that some people think that Barbie is not good for girls. Something about hurting their self-esteem or something. WHAT?! When I started wistfully and happily reminiscing about the Barbie World of my youth, I realized something…you know what…wow, no way…one of my inspirations in life is actually BARBIE! Yes, Barbie. I want to be like Barbie when I grow up. Barbie inspires me to “do it all”. Barbie has the everything life: many successful careers (I mean she’s an Ambassador, President of the United States, Firefighter, Paleontologist, Teacher, Fashion Designer, etc. etc.), a college education, she is well-traveled, she has a loving long-term monogamous relationship with a very supportive Ken, she has a loving network of family and friends, she’s recession-proof (have you seen her Dream House, wardrobe, and cars?), and she does it all while managing to keep her hair done and never mess up her makeup! If that’s not inspirational, then I don’t know what is.

So to all of the Barbie haters I say this, everything I need to know about life, I learned from Barbie: you can be anything you want to be and do anything you want to do in this world while having a haute coordinating outfit for each task and getting it all done while strutting in matching stilettos. Now, can you top that life lesson?

Viva Barbie!

CPSIA Change is Coming - A Must-Read for Parents

January 26th, 2009

As a result of the inauguration of our beloved 44th president, CHANGE is on everyone’s minds, in everyone’s hearts, and at the forefront of everyone’s lives. Change is often thought of in the positive sense, you know, change is good. People are wondering, how can I change myself for the better? How can I turn something from a negative into a positive? Lemons to lemonade? A rock into a diamond?

Well, I am definitely not immune to the whole change phenomenon, in fact, Divas N Babes is facing a major change right now. The difference is this isn’t self-imposed change, this is external-forces-getting-in-the-way-of- things change and I, ever the optimist, am convinced that no matter what, change is good. Let me explain…

CPSIA. What is that? The Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act or CPSIA for short, was passed last year and it bans lead and phthalates in children’s products, mandates third party testing and certification, and requires manufacturers of all goods for children under the age of 12 to label each item with a date and a batch number proving that it underwent and passed testing.

OK, I am a mom, so when I heard this I was like great, yes, it is about time, woooooo, yeah, no more because-of-lead recalls, alright, this is the BEST! Then it hit me, WAIT…I manufacture children’s products, what does this mean for Divas N Babes? I kept reading…

“Anyone who produces or sells any of the following new or used items will be requires to comply with the law: toys, books, clothing…” CLOTHING?! Oh no!

“Any uncertified item intended for children under the age of 12 will be considered contraband after February 10, 2009 and it will be illegal to sell…the government will require their destruction or permanent disposal…” WTH? No, wait, more like, WTF?

OK, so you’re telling me that whatever children’s products I have left in inventory on February 10th must be destroyed?! And then what?! Change is here.

So, I reluctantly and sadly went to the drawing board, drafted an 80% off sale of all Babes items on divasnbabes.com (sale is still going on, you’d better get there quickly, because with the tees at $3.99, stuff is flying off the cyber-shelves fast…this also explains why I haven’t blogged in a little bit), reconceptualized my business processes, redesigned my Babes line into a full Fashion Week worthy couture line to be introduced later this year, smiled a big smile, and left with a huge gallon of lemonade. Change is coming, and I can’t wait!

I really think that this is a wonderful law and I think that more parents need to know about it, which is why I decided to write about it. It is important that all manufacturers and retailers comply with the new law for all of our children’s safety. Because of this, I fully intend to comply…oh yeah and also to avoid the crazy $100,000+ fine and something like 5 years in jail, no thank you. Anyway, the CPSIA is something that all parents should know about to make sure that they are purchasing products that are safe for their children.

Keep your eyes out for the labels after February 10th and be sure to report those companies that are not compliant. After all, if I had to get rid of all of my non-labeled inventory before February 10th, then everyone should have LOL. Believe me, I am on the lookout, and I am TELLING!

Be sure to visit us at www.divasnbabes.com for 80% off all Babes onesies and tees!


The Uncrustables

January 12th, 2009

One thing that I cannot stand is a green, crusty nose on an otherwise adorable child. I mean I absolutely loathe the crust. Back in the BC days (Before Children), I was the uninformed, kidless one talking about “yuck, did you see that little snot-nose…yeesh, someone needs to wipe that…NOW…whew!”. Now, I’m a lot more compassionate, but you don’t know how many times I have been at a playdate, Gymboree, Benjamin’s school, the park, somewhere and the cutest little one will come up to me and my kids with the snottiest nose and I am like OMG, where is your MOM?! Please someone get a tissue for this poor little soul. Well, as they say, what goes around comes around, karma baby…

Winter 2009 has introduced two new characters in our house, “The Uncrustables” aka Benjamin and Anna. No matter how many boxes of tissues I am armed with, nor how many times I wipe, and rewipe, and wipe some more, nor how many times I tackle and hold, tackle and hold so that I can de-crust them, I am powerless against the crust, but I refuse to lose this battle! I must admit, I am pretty obsessed with de-crusting and I do nose checks about every 5-10 minutes. Anna sees me looking closely at her nose and she starts to whimper LOL. There will be no crusty little noses in this house, oh heck no, the boogies and I are not friends and people will not talk about my snot-nosed kids!

So far this season, they have alternated with having colds so one week it will be Benjamin’s turn and one week it’s Anna’s turn so I have been able to take a deep breath and cope with it OK, knowing that there will be at least one clean nose I can count on for my sanity, but this week, they decided to tag-team me and so now it’s Mommy vs. The Uncrustables. Current score: Mommy 7, The Uncrustables 1,038.

Anna is 6 months so her nose is so little and cute and still so “awwwwww, let me clean the little nose-y”, but Benjamin and his preschool-sized crust is a whole DIFFERENT story! WTH? OK, this was so not in the Mommy Manual…when did his nose go from “awwwww sweetie” to “OMG, where is your MOM?! Oh yes, it’s me…great…NOOOOOOOOOO…OK, breathe, pull yourself together, Tonjia, OK now…puh-LEASE go get me order generic viagra order levitra buy viagra professional order generic viagra buy cheap cialis cialis professional buy viagra online a tissue NOW so I can clean this CRAZY NOSE!” while I close my eyes and attempt to wish it all away? I was definitely not prepared for the transition! I guess I didn’t realize that noses and crust are directly proportional.

Let me just say that Spring can’t come quickly enough for me. I am not looking forward to the green coming, but the green going away!

Let’s hear from you: How do you deal with the winter-time crust? Do you have any secrets to share? I need them!

Happy Birthday to Me!

January 9th, 2009

OK, so I guess I am getting off to a slow start this year, but I promise, I promise I will do better next week! Plus, I have a great excuse…yesterday was my 31st birthday!

Before I get into the details of the day, let me just reflect on how I feel about 31. I’m actually pretty excited about officially being in my 30s. I remember being in my teens and in college trying to think about (gasp!) The Thirty-Year-Old Tonjia and I couldn’t even grasp the concept, it was just too foreign to even conceive that I wouldn’t be a young vibrant thing one day, but you know, I actually feel just as youthful as I did back then, just 2 kids and lots of life experiences wiser and 2 kids and lots of dining experiences heavier, but dare I say, I think I am definitely like wine…I am so getting better as I age…owwwww! I am loving my 31 year old swagger right now, and I have plenty of child-carrying hips to put into that swagger so I guess I should just “work it, diva” :)

So, back to the day. On Wednesday night, I decided that I was going to “chillax” my birthday right on in and set the tone for the next day. I put the kids to sleep, cleaned up the kitchen, finished up all of my work-related checklist stuff, took a long hot shower, made me a cup of hot chocolate, and sat down to surf the Internet, just because I felt like it. No work, no bill-paying, nothing but “I just feel like being on the Internet and so I am.” I was feeling all warm and cozy inside…ahhhh, time to go to sleep and wake up refreshed and being the Birthday Princess Mommy tomorrow. ZZZZZZZZ…

“Mommy, um, hello Mommy, um can I have some apple juice?”

Ignore.

“Um, Moooommmmmy, Mommmmmmy, MOMMY! CAN I HAVE SOME AP-PLE JUICE?!”

Really ignore.

After what felt like an eternity of Benjamin asking me in very best preschool manners if he could have some apple juice and since the ignoring thing was not working, I decided I would get up and get this child some apple juice and start my perfect beautiful birthday off. I opened my eyes and looked at the clock and it was 4:30AM! WTH? “goooooooo aaaaaaaaa brrrrrrrrmp!” Great, Benjamin, thanks, hi Anna. Double WTH?! Happy Birthday to Me!

Two hours, two very awake and laughing kids who never went back to sleep, and a sunrise later, I decided to get up and start my Birthday. I couldn’t help but to laugh at how different birthdays are now than when I was a child. What ever happened to the whole sleeping-in, you are the center of the day, “whatever you want to do, honey” birthday? Then I looked over at the smiling and playing cuties laying on me singing along to Sesame Street and I realized that I had the best birthday present of all: playing with, hugging and kissing, laughing and tickling, and watching the sunrise with the most precious gifts I could I ever receive. This is perfect, what else could a Birthday Mommy ever want?

At 2:00, I was certainly walking into the spa for my Birthday appointment :)

Let’s hear from you: What was your last birthday like? Did your babes do anything special for you?

A Name By Any Other Name

January 6th, 2009

One of the greatest tasks for any mother-to-be is deciding on a name for their little bundle of joy. Baby naming for some is a daunting task, full of fear, uncertainty, and “I-don’t-want-to-give-my-child-a-name-he-will-hate”-ness. For others, like me, baby naming is something they have been looking forward to for months, years, and even decades. Baby naming is my passion, I am such a baby name nerd. I LOVE names! Origin, etymology, trends, derivatives…love love love it. All of my dolls and pets had first and middle names, even my Cabbage Patch Kids, who came with names, had to be renamed because their names weren’t good enough for me (some of the flows were just like wth?). Of course, then, when it came time to think of names for our firstborn, I was in heaven.

I decided that I wanted him to have an undoubtedly masculine name, manly you know, one that honored family members, one that was traditional and classic and stands the test of time, one that wasn’t too common, yet one that was easily recognizable, and most importantly, one that everyone knows how to spell (can you tell that I live life as a Tonjia?). I love names so much that I couldn’t decide on 1 middle name, so oh let’s give him 2, oh how regal that would be and so we have: Benjamin Gregory William…perfection in my eyes.

Fast forward 3 years and young Benjamin Gregory William is in preschool and is learning how to write his entire name…WTH was I thinking?! Every day, we have the same conversation: “Mommy, my name is Benjamin Gregory right?…no, honey, don’t forget the William, its Benjamin Gregory William, OK?…OK, Mommy, Benjamin Gregory!”.

It doesn’t help that he is totally infatuated with letters and learning how to write them and he wants to write BENJAMIN himself on his little chalkboard all day. It’s enough to make me, Ms. “I might not choose the name Benjamin although I love it so much because I totally dislike the nickname BEN and if anyone calls him BEN I am going to flip”, the original anti-Ben herself say “Benjamin, honey, let’s write it like this…see…B-E-N…that’s it, we’re done, wow, you are such a great writer!” Of course, young Benjamin screamed “Mommy, THAT DOES NOT SAY BENJAMIN…I want it to SAY BENJAMINNNNNNN” and we spend 30 more minutes adding J-A-M-I-N. Fun times.

Although I still love his name as much as I did when I had my eureka moment 3 years ago, I must say that I am so happy that our 2nd child is Anna :)

Let’s hear from you: What was your baby naming process like? How did you decide on baby names? How do you feel about your name choice now?


Kidless in New York

January 6th, 2009

OK, so I promised a blog a day this New Year and I really didn’t break my resolution already, it’s just that yesterday was a craaaaazy day…let me explain…

I had a series of afternoon meetings yesterday in NYC so I jumped on the Amtrak to take the 2 hour ride. It seemed like all was well, but wait…I felt different, I was lighter…and quicker…and wait, where is my baggage?! Oh yes, I left Anna at home :( I really wanted to bring Anna with me, but she has a pesky cough and isn’t feeling well so I decided to travel without her. Anna is my sidekick, you know, my BFF, and because we are bosom buddies, I never leave home without her (it’s MUCH easier to bring her), but work had to be done so alone I must go.

I eased into the first empty seat I could find and amazingly, I fit into one seat! OOOOK, this is new, so now what? Um, um, play with the baby? No. Um, um, uhh, get a coloring book for my preschooler so he can be quiet and the annoyed looks can stop? No. What do I do?! Of course, I’ll just call Natalia and ask how the kids are!

I finally reached NYC and gleefully headed for my first destination. It was easy, I felt…free! It was great! Here I am in my casual suit and some real shoes, glasses on, real business-like, strolling through my city, ho hum, la de da de da, until…

“pssssst, pssssst, hey *kiss kiss kiss*, hey pretty in pink…”

*music stops, record scratching*

Oh NO, I left my pervert repellent at home! Where are my kids when I need them? No one ever bothers the harried always late woman in a velour suit, UGG boots, hair clipped up, with 3 huge bags running down the street with an infant strapped to her and a 3 year old talking incessantly in the stroller. That’s when I realized being kidless is not always bliss.

Then nature called, it’s been 5 hours since Anna’s last feeding, where is she, she needs to eat, oh no, I need to pump. Here I am right before my 5:00 meeting and I HAVE to pump. Great! I looked around, rows and rows of cubicles, and see-through conference rooms, NOOOOOOOO! I had to settle for the last place EVER that I would choose to pump, and you can call me a pump-snob if you like, but I had to pump in a public bathroom. Gasp! Let me just say that standing and manually pumping with one hand while holding the stall shut with the other has to be an Olympic sport.

So, 5 hours, multiple “hey grey pants, hey beautiful, pssssst pssssst, *kiss kiss kiss*, sexeeeeeee, “you talking to me on that phone? you need my number first!”" later and strangely feeling like a cat, I hurried to Penn Station and jumped on the first train back home. I couldn’t wait to get home and see the children peacefully sleeping, their angelic faces smiling at sweet dreams…oh I miss my babies.

I finally got home, whew, peace and quiet, ahhhhhh, they are snug little bugs, now to relax…

“Mommy?…Mommy?” Oh no, Benjamin! 3 seconds later “waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaa” OH NO, ANNA TOO!

Great, where is my kidless bliss again?!

Tell us about your kidless stories. Was it all that you imagined? Hopefully, it was better than my experience!

Fashion Friday #1 - Frame Your Face

January 2nd, 2009

Moms often complain that we don’t have a lot of time to put ourselves together the way we would like to, because we are always getting everyone else together, so of course we are often left going out of the door looking like we are constantly under-construction (steamrolled, bulldozed, and all of that!). One thing we can do that’s very easy and inexpensive is to make sure that our eyebrows are neatly arched. Like the beautiful work of art that your face is (feel better moms?), it needs a frame to bring it all together and nothing makes you look more polished with the least amount of effort than neatly groomed eyebrows.

So what do you need to create your perfect frame?

Well, first you need to start somewhere if you haven’t already. There are three major ways to shape your brows: waxing, threading, and tweezing.

Waxing is a very common way to get those brows in shape. It’s relatively inexpensive, it’s very accessible (you can go anywhere from your local nail salon to a high-end day spa), it’s very quick, and the results last for about 2-3 weeks. Waxees beware, when choosing a waxer, make sure you watch her do more than a few eyebrows before you go sit in her chair, because waxing is not a precision technique and your brows can end up officially being “chopped and skrewed” BIG TIME (and the 8 week grow out period is not fun)! Also, make sure that she uses a combo of waxing, tweezing, and trimming in order to get the perfect shape. Straight waxing is not enough.

Threading is an ancient method of hair removal which originated in parts of Asia and uses 100% cotton thread to shape your brows. It is gaining popularity because it is more precise than waxing and allows for a better shape. Threading is not yet available in all areas, but when looking for threaders, it is best to find a salon or person that specializes in threading. Threading can really hurt if you don’t have the right person, so be careful. Threaded eyebrows are beautiful, I love them!

Tweezing is the third method and I recommend it in conjunction with the above methods. Tweezing stray hairs is a great way to stretch out the time between waxing or threading appointments. You can go 4-6 weeks if you are dedicated to tweezing stray hairs each day. Don’t get too tweezer-happy! Tweezing can be addictive and you can alter the shape of your brows if you tweeze too many hairs.

After you have your perfect shape, just fill in your brows every morning, if needed, and go! There are many ways to fill in your brows: brow pencils and eyebrow powder (my preference with MAC’s angled brush) are two popular ways. Just be sure to choose a shade that’s a little lighter than your brow hairs.

So the next time a crazy morning comes your way, don’t despair… you are now ready to face the world!

Let’s hear from you: what are your favorite eyebrow tips? What are some dos and don’ts when it comes to eyebrow grooming?

Happy New Year!

January 1st, 2009

Welcome to 2009! I for one am very excited about this year and all of the possibilities that it may bring. I hope that this New Year brings peace, love, and prosperity to your family!

One of our New Year’s Resolutions here at Divas N Babes is to make sure that we are reaching out and supporting all of the mommy-divas out there so this year we are committed to our all new Divas Den Blog. Last night when I was thinking about what I would write about each day, I couldn’t really decide on one specific topic (I loved all of them!) so I guess the Divas Den Blog is going to be all about my random ramblings about life now as a mother of two and all of the craziness that goes along with it. I know a whole lot of you out there can relate and I am hoping that we can help each other maintain sanity or at least be sisters in the struggle! Can’t wait!

I am also really excited about our Fashion Fridays here at the Divas Den Blog, which is where we share some of the little things that help us to maintain our mom-me style. I think it is SO important to try and maintain a positive self-image, especially after baby when a LOT of things have changed (clothes size being one of them…but we won’t talk about that right now, please) and life as you once knew it is over. I am hoping that Fashion Fridays will help us help each other to look and feel like the “diva” that we are, even though we are overworked, sleep-deprived, being pulled in a thousand directions wearing a thousand and ONE hats, while running the household, working the boardroom, and kissing boo-boos, etc. etc. aka being a Mommy.

I can’t wait to share my adventures of 2009 with you and I am looking forward to sharing yours. I guarantee that it will be one interesting ride. Raise your glasses divas (oh and don’t let me be the party-pooper because mine has sparkling cider…I am nursing :) !

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!

Love,

Tonjia

“Are You Having Twins?” - Ridiculous things that people say to pregnant moms

July 6th, 2008

I absolutely LOVE being pregnant, I really do. I love everything about it: bonding with the growing life inside of me, feeling all of her movements as we go about our day, daydreaming about what she looks like, and most of all my big, round, robust belly. Yes, I love my belly as it grows from the little bump, to the round basketball, to the HUGE ripe watermelon that it is at 36 almost 37 weeks, I love every part of it, emerging stretch marks and all.

What I don’t like is the crazy comments that come from the mouths of strangers that I can’t bring myself to believe are actually well meaning. I mean do people really think about what it is they are saying before they open their mouths to say it?

I have been thinking about this my entire pregnancy and I have been meaning to write about it, but I never did, because I thought it was just me being cranky, hormonal, hungry, and pregnant, but I have heard some things in my late pregnant state that are just ridiculous and now I am convinced that I am not the crazy one (this time that is!).

So here are my top 5 comments that I hear almost every day and remember, maybe I AM sensitive, but goodness, I am chock-full of estrogen, give me a break:

Are you having twins?
– Now, this might be understandable when you are in your 9th month, but I have been hearing this since I was 6 months! When I kindly say no with a very hard to create smile on my face, they then say “Are you sure?” or one time this man said “Triplets? Quadruplets?” On Thursday, this young lady actually chased me down to stop me and ask me was I having twins and when I said no and probably gave her the glance of death because it was like 95 degrees outside, she apologetically said “Oh, well, um, sorry, um, you look good though.” WHAT?!

You must be due any day now
– OK, now this one is also more tolerable now that I am 37 weeks, but hearing this everyday from let’s say around 26 weeks is a little bit annoying. I can’t possibly be THAT big.

You look like you are about to BUST! (Usually followed by a “ha ha ha!”) – Now this one is probably highest on my “OMG, I can’t believe you just said that to me” list. How in the world do you say this to someone and expect her to take this kindly? I just don’t get it! Firstly, the visual is horrible, I just picture my happy little belly exploding and my sweet baby just flying into space…that’s definitely not the serene vision of birth that I have. Secondly, how BIG is someone/something that it is just about to bust? This one I hear every day without fail. Crazy!

I KNOW you’re hot! / You look HOT! - Why this one annoys me, I can’t really put my finger on it, but it does. Maybe because it is July, so yes I am hot, but isn’t everyone?

Finally, here is the craziest one I ever heard…

This lady POINTED to my belly and said “that looks like it HURTS!” I don’t even have words for this one…

So anyway, I just had to get that off of my chest. People, if you encounter a big, huge, watermelon-bellied, hot-looking, pregnant mom that looks like she is overdue with twins and her belly just hurts like heck for her to carry it, please just smile at her and tell her “you look great mama, keep up the good work!” or something like that and save her from running to her nearest chocolate stash to keep from going crazy…on you that is!

HOT mama who is about to bust although I am not having twins (at least not according to my doctor and the ultrasound tech),
T


Countdown to Baby #2 - 36 weeks and counting…

July 3rd, 2008

OK, so yes, I have seemingly dropped off the earth for the last few months, but I am back and I am bigger and better than ever (and please let me emphasize the BIGGER part!). Let me explain…it goes something like this:

Mommy finds out she is expecting her 2nd baby in late July 2008

Mommy immediately goes into preparation mode for new baby while maintaining her crazy life as mommy, wife, entrepreneur, daughter, friend, everything-to-everybody-except-myself…meaning Mommy is cramming 36 hours into 24 hours while being X weeks pregnant and has no time for anything

Mommy is sentenced to bed-rest by her loving doctor (I guess I needed a vacation?) in order to prevent another premature birth

Type-A, anal-retentive, perfectionist, over-prepared, and over-zealous Mommy-in-panic-mode gets everything on her perpetual To Do list done (including packing 2 very large suitcases for her all-expenses paid trip to the luxurious hospital birthing suite, yes 2 suitcases and working on 3, I know I am crazy, you can say it) and now…

I am back and I am waiting patiently for Baby Girl to arrive!

Oh how I have missed writing and oh how many stories I have to share from this crazy journey that has landed me at 36 weeks, but hopefully I have yet a few more weeks to go and we can definitely play catch-up. I promise you, it will be a riot…

Oh yes, and please remind me to tell you about these suitcases. I absolutely need everything in there, I tell you! Yes, even the bags of dark chocolate Raisinets and Haribo Gummi Bears for energy in labor and the 2 iPods with duplicate playlists with 2 types of speakers AND headphones just so I can be sure that I have my birth music…are you calling me crazy again?

How I’ve missed you all…

Signing off with some Braxton-Hicks,
T